Times, they are a changin'.

Tygre moved out yesterday. I was so sad that I cried. I moved some stuff into her echoing room to make it look less abandoned.

I am so thrilled that she is getting married. Dan and I are headed to Corpus this weekend to be in the wedding. I just have one work day to go and then we can party!

I have started hearing the end of school countdown from the students. Summer is just around the corner. The seniors are getting anxious and everyone has Spring fever. It is really funny. I remember how hard it was to concentrate as a Senior at Carroll. We had a neat design to our school that had breezeways between narrow building with grass and trees. Whatever window you looked out of had something to distract you from class.

High school was a lot of fun. I had no idea at the time what was coming. I was ignorant of the journey God was about to take me on. He changed the plans I had made for myself and sent me back to Oklahoma. (That is an awesome story for another time...the moral is that I knew exactly where God wanted me and it would have been disobedience to go elsewhere.)

I joined up with the Baptist Student Union where I was active for 8 years as a student and staff member. God shook up every area of my life and I learned so much at OU. What an exciting experience.

A few of my seniors from A&P are going to OU next year. I am so jealous that they are just starting out on that awesome journey but I don't know that I would do it again. Don't we always say that?

My challenge to those of you who made it to the end of this post: Thinking back to your Senior year of high school, what did you think you would become? (Major, Career, marriage, etc) Then tell me what actually happened!

I thought I would be a medical missionary using all of my fabulous nursing skills. I also thought I would be a graduate of Texas A&M University and married to ...

Okay, What is yours!?

The Return of the Skitmeister

After a 6 year absence I have returned to the stage in my first skit. Actually, I did two yesterday. It was so much fun.

We were promoting the Hope River Run, an 8K race that my church is putting on next weekend and I got to play a six year-old girl and a Rosanne Rosannadanna type newscaster but with a crazy New York accent.

I have been helping with the CLPS drama class and it is a blast. I can't wait to see those kids up there showing their stuff in May when we put on our play. We had the first run through today and will cast before the end of class on Friday. I am so stoked.


Recent songs: American Girl by Carrie Underwood, The Lighthouse by Nickel Creek, All of Sarah Barielles

Recent TV: Ramsey's Kitchen Nightmare

Recent Movies: The Absent Minded Professor, The Assassination of Jesse James by the coward Robert Ford, Michael Clayton, The Other Boleyn Girl.

Recent Books: Total Forgiveness, The Complete Book of Yoga

The Funniest Thing EVER!

Okay, I stole this from Paige. Jenny showed me some of these months ago and I never got over it. One day I was having such a sad day and I watched this video and started rolling! Enjoy!

111th Post

For my landmark 111th post I am going to post the mental list running in my head right now.

To Do:
1. Finish up Cardiovascular System notes for A&P.
2. Start writing a Biology test.
3. Play Scrabulous on Facebook
4. Help Mrs. Holiday look for possible plays for Drama.
5.Wait until at least 7:20 pm to start watching American Idol, thus bypassing all commercials and the corny intro where the CGI dude raises his arms.
6. Review Biology notes so class goes smoothly.
7. Make some muffins or cookies to be used in a "mining" experiment in Earth Science.
8. Eat the leftovers.
9. Check my email.
10. Wash the dinner dishes.
12. Play Scrabulous on Facebook...why do I have 15 games going and it is never my turn?!
11. Start a load of laundry so I have clean dress socks
12. Find time to reply to Sus' huge, wonderful email.
13. Read a few chapters from Total Forgiveness.
14. Update my French podcasts.
15. Plug in my iPhone before it dies.
16. Play Scrabulous on Facebook...resist temptations to use cheats on the internet. Resist the urge to believe all your friends are cheating you.
17. Read the list of things that make me happy and be happy.
18. Take some Tums to get past the feeling left in your stomach by that Frito Chili Pie.
19. Put some socks on so my toes don't freeze.
20. Try to decide what to buy Tygre for her shower this weekend.
21. Call Karen to find a place to sleep when we get to Norman.
22. Buy some Ice Cream for the Barn Dance.
23. Wash western wear for Barn Dance.
24. Space out while looking at a heart diagram.
25. Read everyone else's blog to avoid doing #s 1-24.


Well there it is. I have a choleric tendency to make these huge lists of things to be done but unlike a Melancholy I never check them off. I get distracted like a Sanguine and wish I could be phleg. Oh well. ENJOY!

Amy

The Film Critic Returns

After a long absence I have moved the Pop Culture Critic to Blogger. Check it out under the "CriticalMe" link or just click here.

30 Things that Make Me Happy!

Things that make me happy:

1. Finding shows that I love automatically recorded on my DVR.
2. Having old friends find me on Facebook.
3. Seeing my sister.
4. Cleaning out my car and having it smell like Febreeze.
5. Putting 100's on the tops of quizzes.
6. Getting flowers.
7. Falling right to sleep.
8. Putting lots of points in mycokerewards.
9. Getting personalized notes/pictures on assignments my students turn in.
10. Having someone compliment something I organized.
11. Getting Comments on my blog.
12. Being the first to hear big news.
13. Getting magazines in the mail.
14. Opening up bags and bags of great clothes Holly just threw out.
15. Getting email on my iPhone.
16. Listening to the "Wicked" soundtrack. Dorky, I know.
17. Having a good "shuffle" day with my iPod.
18. Making a really tasty dinner that makes Dan and Tygre happy.
19. When all the laundry is clean.
20. Planning parties (always with a theme and costumes)
21. Going to the Movie Tavern.
22. When Dan doesn't get mad at me when I drop a three pound book on his model he's been customizing for months even when it breaks the frame!
23. My black and pink glasses.
24. Making new, cool friends.
25. Visitors from out of town.
26. Promises of a future in ministry.
27. Knowing where every country in the world is.
28. Getting challenged in church.
29. Thinking about another cruise.
30. Writing this blog.

I would like to hear 30 things that make you happy. If you can't do it then you need to see the glass as half full!

Amy

Word MixUps!

I stole this for Sharon!


DORMITORY:
When you rearrange the letters:
DIRTY ROOM

PRESBYTERIAN:
When you rearrange the letters:
BEST IN PRAYER

ASTRONOMER:
When you rearrange the letters:
MOON STARER

DESPERATION:
When you rearrange the letters:
A ROPE ENDS IT

THE EYES:
When you rearrange the letters:
THEY SEE

GEORGE BUSH:
When you rearrange the letters:
HE BUGS GORE

THE MORSE CODE:
When you rearrange the letters:
HERE COME DOTS

SLOT MACHINES:
When you rearrange the letters:
CASH LOST IN ME

ANIMOSITY:
When you rearrange the letters:
IS NO AMITY

ELECTION RESULTS:
When you rearrange the letters:
LIES - LET'S RECOUNT

MOTHER-IN-LAW:
When you rearrange the letters:
WOMAN HITLER

SNOOZE ALARMS:
When you rearrange the letters:
ALAS! NO MORE Z 'S

A DECIMAL POINT:
When you rearrange the letters:
IM A DOT IN PLACE

THE EARTHQUAKES:
When you rearrange the letters:
THAT QUEER SHAKE

ELEVEN PLUS TWO:
When you rearrange the letters:
TWELVE PLUS ONE

AND FOR THE GRAND FINALE:

PRESIDENT CLINTON OF THE USA:
When you rearrange the letters
(With no letters left over and using each letter only once):
TO COPULATE HE FINDS INTERNS

Attitude Changes and Twirly Skirts.

Everything is changing and I am so thankful to God for the perspective He is giving me.

We moved to Fort Worth in August and have been doing our own thing for months. I've been struggling just to get stuff together for school and taking care of my husband but haven't made meaningful relationships at my church. I have, however, made some fantastic friends amongst the lovely teachers at CLPS!

This week, everything changed. I went to a meeting of the Hope Drama group, Studio 1750. It was really great and I met some lovely people. I filmed a short video with some fab Hope goers and helped set up photo ops at the Girls' Sock Hop tonight.

By the way, the Sock Hop was the most adorable thing I have seen in years, perhaps even in my whole life. Tons of elementary aged girls in poodle skirts, rolled jeans and scarves in their hair running about frantically, huddling in groups to socialize and doing the limbo with fervor.

What is it about the make up of woman that makes her glow when in a twirly skirt? God embedded that one deep.

I am reminded of a scene from "Runaway Bride" where Julia Roberts tries on a wedding dress and says her favorite part is how it swishes like a bell when she moves. Every girl relates to that.
I came home smiling and exhausted, ready to tackle nursery duty tomorrow at church.

The whole point of all of this is to express how much my attitude has changed towards our place here in Fort Worth. It really is all up to me and taking advantage of opportunities to serve and meet people through those opportunities.

Things are looking up and my soul is incredibly full.

Blessings!

Blog Transitions?

Well, I am getting a few new readers on my blog which I enjoy. Maybe it is time to bring a bit more maturity to my posts. Is this even possible?

Dan started Seminary today! I am so excited for him. I am sure he has a few different feelings, especially because he is the one with the homework. It just finally feels as if we are accomplishing the goals for which we moved to Fort Worth in the first place.

It’s funny how a few months of doing something different could make it seem as though our life has lost some of its purpose. It is easy to believe that your life has no influence for God because we aren’t daily preparing Bible studies and making disciples and meeting one on one.

But what we are achieving is perfect. We are achieving obedience. God told us to come here. It wasn’t easy or happy at times but He said go and we went. I am proud of where we are. And though we are setting our faces like flint and settling in for the long haul I know whom I have believed and I am convinced that He is able to guard what I have entrusted to Him until that day.

We covet your prayers and hope for phone calls to brighten our days.

Winter Depression

I am too depressed to update.

Cruise = :)

32 Degree Fort Worth = :(

What to Pack for A Cruise!

Here is what is going into my suitcase. It's a really big one!

1 Bible
7 Shorts
7 Tee Shirts
8 Day Shirts
2 Fancy Shirts (for karaoke?)
1 Nice Skirt
1 60's style black sparkle courtesy of my sister
1 sparkle black dress courtesy of me.
2 other dresses just in case I feel like it.
4 Bathing suits (1 is for Jenny) because no one likes to put dampness on. Eww.
8 Tank tops
6 pairs of socks (won't I just wear flips all week?)
Ample unmentionables
1 chubby tucky inny thingy
2 pairs of heels
4 other random pairs of shoes
3 capris
1 pair jeans
1 hoodie
5 Wal Mart sacks because no one like to put dampness in their suitcase. Eww.
1 Evening bag full of all my sparkly jewelry.
Toiletries
Gold bond!
Antibacterial hand stuff
1 Backpack
1 Sooners cap
1 Sunscreen
1 Accelerator
1 Pair Sunglasses
Perfume
1 Backpack for excursions


To Carry On:
Make Up
iPod
Camera
Sunglasses (a spare in the other bag)
Passports
Boarding stuff
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hollows
Wallet



I can't wait. I few more days until I am floating in the blue blue Caribbean sea! Bon Voyage to me!

Yet another post....But with MITTENS on!

i am typing 3with mittiens on sanrf anf notbaviing not back s0qacingl ]]


d0o you umderstamf wjawt i aam typinfg. ?
I am r3alloy bor3ed 4itht5 right now can yo9uj tell?

wow~ i didnmt'[ think that wanyh of the letters w3ouild come out. You shouldtry this sometingf if y9ou aqer ar3 evfer asd b ored ads me.

I aqm going to fo go cook some Chineses food for dinmner!

Yuuuuuuuuuu,m!

WE4 ARE GPOIJGM GOIMG ON A CRUISE IOM AW FE4W DSYS. GALVAETOMN, GHR4AND CVAY,SMSM CAY,EMAN, COZXUMEL ANDF MY BIRTHDAY!!!! WOO HOO! OH YEAH OCHO RIOS. i accedentlawlly put om th4 cwpsd lock.

i wm aw,am done4 now! Happy New Year4
!

\

Do Nothing O-Matic

I post a lot. Check out this link. I dig it.

Do Nothing O Matic

Best Memory of College

The night of pranks!

One night in college me and a few friends of mine. Namely, Susanne Scott and Lindsay Wilson pulled some fab pranks picking up friends as we went along.

Later they were featured in the OU Daily. Someone was a very knowledgeable informant giving details to the writer that only an insider could have known. That informant ( I presume) then printed the article and sent it to my dorm room via intercampus mail making them untraceable. However, I was honored to see that my pranks are living in the archives somewhere.

The pranks included:
Locking a friend in his bathroom while he was in the shower, stealing his keys and then locking him out of the front door to his dorm.

While he struggled to get into his room (and I assume into some clothes as his were laid out on his bed) we moved his car, filled it will Papa John's flyers we found in a huge box downstairs in Walker and then hiding in the bushes pushing the lock button so it beeped annoyingly as he searched all over for the source.

He forgave us quickly and then joined us as we headed to Adam's tower to steal a friends couch. We moved it to Couch Tower minus the cushions (all pun intended) and circulated the cushions for several weeks amongst our friends.

A few weeks later, after the girls had recovered the couch we snuck back into their room via the suitmate (who was very angry afterward but eventually forgave me) and filled the whole room with crumpled up newspaper. This took several hours and 5 people or so but it was worth it. When they came home from a weekend at home they couldn't get their door open.

We felt bad and cleaned out the 6ft high pile of paper and moved it to the trash shoot (which was closed in the basement) We soon discovered that we had filled all 8 floors of trash shoot in that tower and had to lug everything to the 12th floor. We stuffed all eleven stories full of newspaper.

Of course, I may not be the originator of these pranks. I am just telling you what I heard and take no responsibility.

Blessings!

Stinkin Hillary Swank!

P.S. I love you made me cry six times, bawl in my car and come home and hug on my poor husband who had no idea how a night out with the girls could send him back an hysterically weeping woman.

4 stars

Unorginal!

More Junk!

205 FACTS

1. The electric chair was invented by a dentist.

2. You share your birthday with at least 9 million people.

3. The Boston University Bridge is one of the few places in the world where a boat can sail under a train driving under a car driving under an airplane.

4.5. Cats have over 100 vocal cord sounds. Dogs have about 10.

6. Our eyes are always the same size from birth, but our nose and ears never stop growing.

7. David Prowse was the guy in the Darth Vader suit in Star Wars; he spoke all of Vader's lines, and didn't know he would be dubbed over by James Earl Jones until he saw the screening of the film.

8. In every episode of Seinfeld, there is a Superman somewhere.

9. Montpeiler, Vermont is the only US state capital without a McDonald's.

10. No word in the English language rhymes with orange, month, silver or purple.

11. The cruise line, Queen Elizabeth II, moves six inches for each gallon of diesel it burns.

12. The first Ford cars had Dodge engines.

13. Babies are born without knee caps. They don't appear until 2-6 years of age.

14. Nutmeg is extremely poisonous if injected intravenously.

15. Michael Jordan makes more money from Nike annually than all of the Nike factory workers in Malaysia combined.

16. The first toilet ever seen on television was on Leave It to Beaver.

17. Only one person in 2 billion will live to be 116 or older.

18. The name Wendy was made up for the book Peter Pan.

19. Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories per hour.

20. Humans, chimps, and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure.

21. Human beings are the only animals with the ability to have sex facing each other. Creighton Smith (a primatologist) disagrees with this and he sent us proof click here Thanks Creighton !

22. The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.

23. You can't kill yourself by holding your breath.

24. Americans, on average, eat 18 acres of pizza every day combined.

25. A pig's orgasm lasts for 30 minutes.

26. Every time you lick a stamp, you are consuming 1/10 of a calorie.

27. You are more likely to be killed by a champagne cork than by a poisonous spider.

28. A crocodile cannot stick its tongue out.

29. Polar bears are always left handed.

30. Ants always fall over on their right side when intoxicated.

31. Some lions mate over 50 times a day.

32. Butterflies taste with their feet.

33. Elephants are the only animal that can't jump.

34. An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.

35. Starfish don't have brains.

36. The average person eats 8 spiders in their lifetime at night.

37. A rhinoceros's horn is made of compacted hair.

38. The shortest war in history was between Zanzibar and England in 1896... Zanzibar surrendered after 38 minutes.

39. A polar bear's skin is black. Its fur is not white, but actually clear.

40. Dueling is legal in Paraguay, as long as both parties are registered blood donors.

41. Donald Duck comics were banned in Finland because he doesn't wear pants.

42. More people are killed by donkeys annually than in plane crashes.

43. Shakespeare invented the words "assassination" and "bump".

44. Marilyn Monroe had six toes.

45. If you keep a Goldfish in a dark room, it will eventually turn white.

46. Women blink nearly twice as often as men.

47. Right handed people, on average, live 9 years longer than left handed people.

48. The name of all the continents end with the same letter that they start with.

49. If the population of China walked past you in single file, the line would never end because of the rate of reproduction.

50. A snail can sleep for 3 years.

51. American Airlines saved $40,000 in 1987 by eliminating one olive from each salad served in first-class.

52. China has more English-speaking people than the United States.

53. Rubber bands last longer when refrigerated.

54. Peanuts are one of the ingredients of dynamite.

55. There are 293 ways to make change for a dollar.

56. The average person's left hand does 56% of the typing.

57. A shark is the only fish that can blink with both eyes.

58. There are more chickens than people in the world.

59. Two-thirds of the world's eggplant is grown in New Jersey.

60. The longest one-syllable word in the English language is "screeched."

61. On a Canadian two dollar bill, the flag flying over the Parliament building is an American flag. Gabriel Gabriel challenges this. She says, the flag on the Canadian 2 dollar bill isn't the American flag, its the union jack.....check it out with a good magnifying glass and you'll see.

62. All of the clocks in the movie "Pulp Fiction" are stuck on 4:20.

63. "Dreamt" is the only English word that ends in the letters "mt".

64. All 50 states are listed across the top of the Lincoln Memorial on the back of the $5 bill.

65. Almonds are a member of the peach family.

66. Winston Churchill was born in a ladies' room during a dance.

67. Maine is the only state whose name is just one syllable.

68. There are only four words in the English language which end in "dous": tremendous, horrendous, stupendous, and hazardous.

69. Los Angeles' full name is "El Pueblo de Nuestra Senora la Reina de los Angeles de Porciuncula"

70. A cat has 32 muscles in each ear.

71. Tigers have striped skin, not just striped fur.

72. In most advertisements, the time displayed on a watch is 10:10.

73. Al Capone's business card said he was a used furniture dealer.

74. The characters Bert and Ernie on Sesame Street were named after Bert the cop and Ernie the taxi driver in Frank Capra's "It's a Wonderful Life."

75. A dragonfly has a life span of 24 hours.

76. A goldfish has a memory span of three seconds. David Buchan challenges this fact.

Article was on TV & published in "The Times" here in the UK on 1st October 2003 that they have a memory span of up to 3 months (& can tell the time!).

Story is listed in the Times news archive (but you need to register to view), so here's a link to the same info: www.nootropic.com/intelligence/smartfish.html

77. A dime has 118 ridges around the edge.

78. It's impossible to sneeze with your eyes open.

79. The giant squid has the largest eyes in the world.

80. In England, the Speaker of the House is not allowed to speak.

81. The microwave was invented after a researcher walked by a radar tube and a chocolate bar melted in his pocket.

82. Mr. Rogers is an ordained minister.

83. The average person falls asleep in seven minutes.

84. There are 336 dimples on a regulation golf ball.

85. "Stewardesses" is the longest word that is typed with only the left hand.

86. The citrus soda 7-UP was created in 1929; "7" was selected because the original containers were 7 ounces. "UP" indicated the direction of the bubbles.

87. Mosquito repellents don't repel. They hide you. The spray blocks the mosquito's sensors so they don't know you're there.

88. Dentists have recommended that a toothbrush be kept at least 6 feet away from a toilet to avoid airborne particles resulting from the flush.

89. The liquid inside young coconuts can be used as substitute for blood plasma.

90. No piece of paper can be folded in half more than 7 times.

91. In the course of an average lifetime you will, while sleeping, eat 70 assorted insects and 10 spiders.

92. 1 in every 4 Americans has appeared on television.

93. You burn more calories sleeping than you do watching television.

94. Oak trees do not produce acorns until they are fifty years of age or older.

95. The first product to have a bar code was Wrigley's gum.

96. The king of hearts is the only king without a mustache.

97. A Boeing 747s wingspan is longer than the Wright brother's first flight.

98. Venus is the only planet that rotates clockwise.

99. The first CD pressed in the US was Bruce Springsteen's "Born in the USA."

100. Apples, not caffeine, are more efficient at waking you up in the morning.

101. The 57 on the Heinz ketchup bottle represents the number of varieties of pickles the company once had.

102. The plastic things on the end of shoelaces are called aglets.

103. Most dust particles in your house are made from dead skin.

104. The first owner of the Marlboro company died of lung cancer.

105. Barbie's full name is Barbara Millicent Roberts.

106. Betsy Ross is the only real person to ever have been the head on a Pez dispenser.

107. Adolph Hitler's mother seriously considered having an abortion but was talked out of it by her doctor.

108. All US Presidents have worn glasses. Some just didn't like being seen wearing them in public.

109. Walt Disney was afraid of mice.

110. The sound of E.T walking was made by someone squishing her hands in jelly.

111. Debra Winger was the voice of E.T.

112. Pearls melt in vinegar.

113. It takes 3,000 cows to supply the NFL with enough leather for a year's supply of footballs.

114. Thirty-five percent of the people who use personal ads for dating are already married.

115. The three most valuable brand names on earth: Marlboro, Coca Cola, and Budweiser, in that order.

116. It is possible to lead a cow upstairs, but not downstairs.

117. Average life span of a major league baseball: seven pitches.

118. A duck's quack doesn't echo and no one knows why. Hold on!!! News Flash....this

just came in....an argument to this fact, thanks to one of our friends on the web who is checking out all of our facts to insure that we are telling the truth. Could we be wrong? (See link below) ....thanks aggieboy

http://www.cnn.com/2003/TECH/science/09/08/duck.quack/index.html

119. The reason firehouses have circular stairways is from the days when the engines were pulled by horses. The horses were stabled on the ground floor and figured out how to walk up straight
staircases.

120. Richard Milhouse Nixon was the first US president whose name contains all the letters from the word "criminal."

121. The second? William Jefferson Clinton.

122. If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee.

123. If you farted consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb.

124. The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet.

125. A cockroach will live nine days without its head before it starves to death.

126. The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body. The female initiates sex by ripping the male's head off.

127. The flea can jump 350 times its body length. It's like a human jumping the length of a football field.

128. The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds.

129. A cat's urine glows under a black light.

130. Q. What occurs more often in December than any other month? A. Conception.

131. Q. What separates "60 Minutes," on CBS from every other TV show? A. No theme song.

132. Q. Half of all Americans live within 50 miles of what? A. Their birthplace.

133. Q. Most boat owners name their boats. What is the most popular boat name requested? A. Obsession

134. Q. If you were to spell out numbers, how far would you have to count until you found the letter "A"? A. One thousand

135. Q. What do bullet proof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers, and laser printers all have in common? A. All invented by women.

136. Q. What is the only food that doesn't spoil? A. Honey

137. Q. There are more collect calls on this day than any other day of the year? A. Father's Day

138. Q. What trivial fact about Mel Blanc (voice of Bugs Bunny) is the most ironic? A. He was allergic to carrots.

139. Q. What is an activity performed by 40% of all people at a party? A. Snoop in your medicine cabinet.

140. The first couple to be shown in bed together on prime time television were Fred and Wilma Flintstone.

141. Coca-Cola was originally green.

142. Every day more money is printed for Monopoly than the US Treasury.

143. Men can read smaller print than women; women can hear & smell better.

144. The State with the highest percentage of people who walk to work: Alaska

145. The percentage of Africa that is wilderness: 28%

146. The percentage of North America that is wilderness: 38%

147. The cost of raising a medium-size dog to the age of eleven: $6,400

148. The average number of people airborne over the US any given hour: 61,000.

149. Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.

150. Each king in a deck of playing cards represents a great king from history: Spades - King David; Clubs - Alexander the Great; Hearts -Charlemagne; Diamonds - Julius Caesar

151. 111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321

152. If a statue in the park of a person on a horse has both front legs in the air, the person died in battle. If the horse has one front leg in the air, the person died as a result of wounds received in battle. If the horse has all four legs on the ground, the person died of natural causes.

153. Only two people signed the Declaration of Independence on July 4th, John Hancock and Charles Thomson. Most of the rest signed on August 2, but the last signature wasn't added until 5 years later.

154. "I am." is the shortest complete sentence in the English language. Faith Ann Gatcomb challenges this. She says, " "I am" cannot be the shortest sentence in the English language because commands with an understood noun are the shortest. For example, "Go!" is a possibility. It is a complete sentence."

155. The term "the whole 9 yards" came from WWII fighter pilots in the South Pacific. When arming their airplanes on the ground, the .50 caliber machine gun ammo belts measured exactly 27 feet, before being loaded into the fuselage. If the pilots fired all their ammo at a target, it got "The whole 9 yards."

156. Hershey's Kisses are called that because the machine that makes them looks like it's kissing the conveyor belt.

157. The phrase "rule of thumb" is derived from an old English law which stated that you couldn't beat your wife with anything wider than our thumb.

158. The name Jeep came from the abbreviation used in the army for the "General Purpose" vehicle, G.P.

159. 23% of all photocopier faults worldwide are caused by people sitting on them and photocopying their buttocks.

160. The only two days of the year in which there are no professional sports games (MLB, NBA, NHL, or NFL) are the day before and the day after the Major League Baseball's all-stars Game.

161. The nursery rhyme "Ring Around the Rosey" is a rhyme about the Black Plague. Infected people with the plague would get red circular sores ("Ring around the Rosey"), these sores would smell very badly so common folks would put flowers on their bodies (inconspicuously), so that it would cover the smell of the sores ("a pocket full of posies"). Furthermore, people who died from the plague would be burned so as to reduce the possible spread of the disease ("ashes, ashes, we all fall down").

162. The world's youngest parents were 8 and 9 and lived in China in 1910.

163. The youngest Pope was 11 years old.

164. The first Novel ever written on a typewriter was "Tom Sawyer"

165. TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the letters only on the one top row of the keyboard.

166. San Francisco Cable Cars are the only Mobile National Monuments.

167. In Shakespeare's time, mattresses were secured on bed frames by ropes. When you pulled on the ropes, the mattress tightened, making the bed firmer to sleep on. Hence the phrase, "goodnight, sleep tight".

168. It was the accepted practice in Babylon 4,000 years ago that for a month after the wedding, the bride's father would supply his son-in-law with all the mead he could drink. Mead is a honey beer and because their calendar was lunar based, this period was called the honey month or what we know today as the honeymoon.

169. In English pubs, ale is ordered by pints and quarts. So in old England, when customers got unruly, the bartender would yell at them mind their own pints and quarts and settle down. It's where we get the phrase "mind your P's and Q's"

170. Many years ago in England, pub frequenters had a whistle baked into the rim or handle of their ceramic cups. When they needed a refill, they used the whistle to get some service. "Wet your whistle" is the phrase inspired by this practice.

172. In Scotland, a new game was invented. It was entitled Gentlemen Only Ladies Forbidden....and thus the word GOLF entered into the English language.

173. It is impossible to lick your elbow. One of our fans "Tyler" has told me that he has seen a girl do this that was double jointed.....hmm....I would have to see that to believe it ....

174. Like fingerprints, everyone's tongue print is different

175. A shrimp's heart is in their head.

176. People say "Bless you" when you sneeze because when you sneeze, your heart stops for a mili-second.

177. In a study of 200,000 ostriches over a period of 80 years, no one reported a single case where an ostrich buried its head in the sand (or attempted to do so - apart from Bones ).

178. It's physically impossible for pigs to look up into the sky.

179. A pregnant goldfish is called a twit

180. Between 1937 and 1945 Heinz produced a version of Alphabetti Spaghetti especially for the German market that consisted solely of little pasta swastikas.

181. On average, a human being will have sex more than 3,000 times and spend two weeks kissing in their lifetime.

182. More than 50% of the people in the world have never made or received a telephone call.

183. Rats and horses can't vomit.

184. The "sixth sick sheik's sixth sheep's sick" is said to be the toughest tongue twister in the English language.

185. If you sneeze too hard, you can fracture a rib.

186. If you try to suppress a sneeze, you can rupture a blood vessel in your head or neck and die.

187. If you keep your eyes open by force, they can pop out.

188. Rats multiply so quickly that in 18 months, two rats could have over million descendants.

189. Wearing headphones for just an hour will increase the bacteria in your ear by 700 times.

190. If the government has no knowledge of aliens, then why does Title 14, Section 1211 of the Code of Federal Regulations, implemented on July 16,1969, make it illegal for U.S. citizens to have any contact with extraterrestrials or their vehicles?

191. The cigarette lighter was invented before the match.

192. Most lipstick contains fish scales

193. February 1865 is the only month in recorded history not to have a full moon.

194. A "jiffy" is an actual unit of time for 1/100th of a second.

195. In the last 4,000 years, no new animals have been domesticated.

196. If you are an average American, in your whole life, you will spend an average of 6 months waiting at red lights.

197. Leonardo Da Vinci invented the scissors

198. The sentence: "The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog" uses every letter of the alphabet.

199. The winter of 1932 was so cold that Niagara Falls froze completely solid.

200. The words 'racecar,' 'kayak' and 'level' are the same whether they are read left to right or right to left (palindromes).

201. There are 293 ways to make change for a dollar.

202. There are two words in the English language that have all five vowels in order: "abstemious" and "facetious."

203. There's no Betty Rubble in the Flintstones Chewable Vitamins.

204. Your stomach has to produce a new layer of mucus every two weeks; otherwise it will digest itself.

205. Over 75% of people who read this will try to lick their elbow.

Internet stuff.

How to Tick People Off

1. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17 inch paper, 99 copies.
2. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sexual favors."
3. Specify that your drive-through order is "TO-GO."
4. If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.
5. Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets.
6. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up."
7. Reply to everything someone says with "that's what you think."
8. Practice making fax and modem noises.
9. Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and "cc" them to your boss.
10. Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.
11. Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with prophesy."
12. Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears and grimacing.
13. Disassemble your pen and "accidentally" flip the ink cartridge across the room.
14. Holler random numbers while someone is counting.
15. Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you "like it that way."
16. Staple pages in the middle of the page.
17. Publicly investigate just how slowly you can make a croaking noise.
18. Honk and wave to strangers.
19. Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complimentary mints at the cash register.
20. TYPE IN UPPERCASE.
21. type only in lowercase.
22. dont use any punctuation either
23. Buy a large quantity of orange traffic cones and reroute whole streets.
24. Repeat the following conversation a dozen times.
    "DO YOU HEAR THAT?"
    "What?"
    "Never mind, it's gone now."
25. As much as possible, skip rather than walk.
26. Try playing the William Tell Overture by tapping on the bottom of your chin. When nearly done, announce "No, wait, I messed it up," and repeat.
27. Ask people what gender they are.
28. While making presentations, occasionally bob your head like a parakeet.
29. Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.
30. Sing along at the opera.
31. Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme.
32. Ask your co-workers mysterious questions and then scribble their answers in a notebook. Mutter something about "psychological profiles."

Water Cooler Tragedy?!

I work at a school. Did I mention this? I teach three days a week. This involves a lot of preparation and prayer that gets spent on some super apathetic teenagers. I love it though. Some moments I just ask the question:

“What do you call organisms that must depend on other organisms for its energy?”

*Insert cricket chirping here*

Then I call on some unwilling participant who answers in astonishment, “Heterotrophic?” They looked around to their friends in shock. Did that just come out of their mouth? Yes! It did!

Proof that you can learn by just sitting there, staring at the wall.

The other two days of the week I work in the front office. I answer the phone and apply four thousand Band aids to kiddos, eyes welling with tears. My most common cuts come from falling. (Do you remember what it is like to have half the coordination you do now?) The others are a mixture of paper cuts, scratches and my personal favorite, the pencil gouge. These poor children have no one to blame but themselves and they often look guilty asking for some first aid while clutching their wounds.

“It’s not your fault, Bucko! You’ll grow into those hands someday!”

The thing that cracks me up the most, however, is the water cooler right outside my office door. We only have one water fountain in the building and it is on the other side of the school. When the water jug is empty, the kids just stand there with their cone cup in their hand…stunned.

I pause nonchalantly from my (insert office task here) and wait silently, not making eye contact.

They push down the lever and nothing comes out. They shake the large plastic jug. Although it is transparent they push the lever again. Nothing. Then they proclaim, “There’s no water!”

Some give up and throw their empty cup away. I have seen a million cups go down without a drop of water having ever been transported by them. Others just stare at me.

Finally I say, “Go to the water fountain.” Again….stunned silence. They look down at the cup in their hands. “You can take your cup with you if you like,” I say. This seems to placate them. What they are going to do with their cone cup is beyond me but off they toddle. Two seconds later another group comes down the hall and the whole thing starts over. Only this time there are 4-6 kids, all with cups in their hands pushing down the lever in turn. Finally one declares that the water is out and they all throw their cups away and go back to class defeated. Sometimes before I can even suggest the obvious, that they go to the water fountain.

The real buzz came one day when the third graders figured out how to turn on the water heater (for those cups of coffee they have all been wanting). They would then try to trick each other into drinking the water from that spout. They all stand around and chuckle and dare each other.

This is the epitome of their day. I thought this was no big deal but I heard kids talking about it for two weeks! “Hey, did you hear that So-N-So turned on the HOT water? It was awesome!”

I am just shocked at the simplicity of life as a child. They aren’t wondering how to pay their rent just how to get water.

You couldn’t pay me enough to go back to those uncoordinated, pencil-gouging, dehydrated days. I’ll take the rent worry.

The Answers!

1. It's A Wonderful Life!"

2. Mean Girls

3. How the Grinch Stole Christmas

4. National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation

5. Miracle on 34^th Street.

6. ELF

7. White Christmas

8. A Christmas Story

9. It’s A Wonderful Life

10. Love Actually

11. While you were Sleeping

12. Better off Dead

13. Grimlins

14. The Santa Clause

15. Home Alone

16. Home Alone

17. National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation

18. A Christmas Carol

19. Rudolf the Red-Nosed Reindeer

20. Elf

21. National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation

22. Miracle on 34^th Street

23. It’s A Wonderful Life